While the actual, religious laws concerning tattooing in the Jewish religion are still open for debate, it is well understood that tattooing, in Judaism, is still considered quite scandalous and taboo for most.That being said, you would imagine those rebellious, wild Semites who broke from tradition and chose to ink themselves would do so with some flair for the dramatic. Not so.
What follows is a list of the 5 most over-done Jewish tattoo trends. All are as trite and trife as a girl putting the Japanese symbol for strength on the area immediately above her bum.
Number 5: Chai: The Hebrew letter representing long life. Usually tattooed on the most unhealthy individuals.
Number 4: A Hebrew phrase for love. Anything popularized by Victoria Beckham & Britney Spears should be permanently banned for life.
Number 3: Pigs, bacon or anything relating to "kosher." We get it. Your ironic. Now, get over yourself. It is like someone tattooing "permanence" on themselves. If you want your tattoo to be a statement about tattooing...you are way too self-indulgent.
Number 2: Pictures of Israel: The Tel Aviv skyline is not nearly as distinctive as, say, New York. Consider getting a tattoo that doesn't require a topography map to decipher.
Number 1: A Jewish Star with some sort of silly embellishment, such as barbed wire, fire or an American flag motif.
What about Victoria Beckham and Britney Spears sharing a bacon cheeseburger and cheersing with a Chai letter superimposed on a star of David bursting forth from the Tel Aviv skyline?
Awesome. One that I saw some years back that might make you cringe was the Star of David tattooed on a kid's elbows.
P. Sull: You made my brain explode a little bit.
Cheers.
The Tel Aviv skyline is quite distinctive for those who live in Israel, thank you
My artist (in Tel Aviv, since you ask...) once did a tattoo of the tablets of the Ten Commandments on this exceedingly Orthodox guy. The client was aware of the general prohibition, but wanted a permanent reminder of something incredibly important to him.
But, yeah, I've seen a fair few dodgy chai and magen David tattoos too.
seeing as images of Hashem are outlawed by Jewish law, and Judaism is a highly intellectual religion WHAT THE FUCK TRIBUTE TO JUDAISM COULD A JEW BE EXPECTED TO FUCKING GET BESIDES CHAIS AND STARS ASSHOLE!!!!
alright let's hear yer top 5 great ideas...
You have tried hurt my feelings. Luckily, all the tattoos of Jewish stars and Chai symbols that I have have numbed my sense and, thus, I feel no pain.
I might meet your challenge. After all, I do get paid per post.
Here is my challenge to you: leave a name in your comment next time, so I can fully appreciate the beauty of your intellectual sophistication.
loved the response craig, well put out :)
i agree with the anonymous guy ASSHOLE
your not a real jew
Dearest Ari,
Thanks. I am sensing you have one or all of the five tattoos I mentioned. No worries, I still love you and I bet your mom thinks you're super cool too.
As for you, Warren...I am currently studying the history of the Altalena. As such, I refuse to engage in a confrontation with a fellow Jew. Pulling apart who is and who is not Jewish is a matter for Nazis, and those who hate us. It is not a game for us to indulge in.
So, I offer you open arms and a strong hug, my Semitic brother. I wish you well and good ink.
warren: 1) the word you want is "you're" as in "you're not a real Jew."
2) clearly you're not a real jew if you can't spell "your" properly. for G-d's sake man, the stereotype is we're smart people- PLEASE do your part to keep that stereotype alive, will ya?
3) go google "Altalena".
great reply Craig.
Jay,
You make me glad.
so if we get just a regular star of david is that alright with your standards? like if we didn't have the embellishments. just kept it as the star and only the star.
and yes most of the tattoo ideas you put up are pretty ridiculous. but then again i've seen people who get tattoos of frikin hello kitty on their tit. so it could be a lot worse.
you say that your right when your wrong. its ok a tattoo is forever so the gilt will stay....
I think we can change the topic of conversation from jewish people with a tattoo pertaining to their religion and focus on all the people with a cross, picture of Jesus or andy other variety of christian iconographic ink jobs who probably have never opened a bible and do not attend church.
Enough said :)
I think Jewish stars with fire are pretty awesome actually... but if I would ever get a tattoo (I wouldn't - I follow the Torah and anyone who is really "Orthodox" would never get one) it would be a pair of lips on my left buttcheek with the words "Kiss Me"
In any case, don't be so damn condescending, it makes anyone with any sense of human nature doubt your integrity
o wait, I just read that Altalena line - good call \m/
I am a recent convert to the Jewish faith and see no problem in getting a tattoo to show on your body what you believe and love. I have plent of tatoos and can not wait to expand my collection with a life long mark of my faith