In further proof that racist tattoos are an inevitably bad choice, Sean 'Crazy Cracker' Roberts has been apprehended after a home invasion. The self-admitted mental matzoh, the wacky wafer, had both the outline of Florida tattooed under his eye and the words "Crazy Cracker" tattooed on his head.
It is these rare moments where I bow to the higher, spiritual forces and admit that I am not good enough to make more fun of this man than the fates have already conspired to do for me.
Instead, I open it up to you, dear readers. Whoever comes up with funniest one-liner about this gentleman wins some Needles and Sins tzotchkes that I am currently e-mailing Marisa about and asking her to make available.
Good Luck!
[It's a recession. I only have stickers. -- MK]
[It's a recession. I only have stickers. -- MK]
belgian tattoo artist: howdy, young feller. what can i do ya fer ya today?
sean roberts: i'm the baddest motherfucker around and i want a facial tattoo!
bta: alrighty...what'd ya have in mind?
sr: something to complement this "Crazy Cracker" on my noggin.
bta: hmmm...how about 56 stars? i do a badass 56 stars.
sr: ah, i don't know. my dad might get pissed.
bta: ok, how about an outline of the state of florida?
sr: killer! can you make it look a little like maryland?
bta: i'll do my best.
Actually, this makes a lot of sense. If his tattoo is to scale, then his brain is Canada.
you might be a redneck if...
is that florida or your dick on your face?
This shitbird has "pretty" as an alias, thats definately from some bubba in prison. You that "pretty" go down on diks like a crazy cracker!
"Mating" Not recomended after the age 35.